Episode 118 - Listen To This If… You’ve Just Received Negative Feedback

Transcript

Jen (00:00:11)

Hello everybody, and a very warm welcome to another episode of Listen to This If from the team at Let's Talk SciComm. I'm Jen, and as ever, I'm joined by my most excellent friend, Michael.

And in these episodes, our goal is to take one problem that you might be tackling at the moment and to each give you our top piece of advice on how to tackle it.

So, hello Michael. Let's just picture it. You have just received some negative feedback. What are you going to do?

Michael (00:00:41)

Yeah, it happens, doesn't it? It happens all the time. I'd actually...

Jen (00:00:45)

It does.

Michael (00:00:46)

I mean, it happens. I mean, we get feedback like this all the time. And I think what I would say is, first of all, all feedback is mixed. It varies in quality. You can't always take everything that people say on board and it's perfectly fine to ignore some feedback.

Having said that, I think when we do receive negative feedback we should use it as an opportunity to reflect and ask ourselves: if someone is saying this, are there any small tweaks I can make? Are there any important facts that I did leave out?

And finally then, I think anytime I've received negative feedback, it's always worth remembering that there are other important things in my life outside of work. Work doesn't define who I am. And when I receive negative feedback, it's just about something that's external to me.

So yeah, it's about the mind frame I think, in which you approach it and understanding that you can, you don't have to take everything on board and certainly shouldn't take everything to heart.

Jen (00:01:51)

Yeah, I think you're so right Michael. Negative feedback, whether it's warranted or not, does not define you and how wonderful a person you are. And I think you're right. There are times you get negative feedback and it's actually not worth paying a lot of attention to for a whole lot of reasons. But of course, sometimes the negative feedback is hugely justified and we dismiss it at our own cost. Because as you say, it's a really important chance to learn and improve.

My piece of advice was going to be, be aware of this thing out there called the negativity bias, which is very well understood that our brains pay a lot of attention to negative feedback. And we've evolved that way, basically because we need to keep ourselves safe.

So I can effectively ignore you know, the ten really delicious pieces of food out there that I've come across, that are all going to taste good because they're not going to be a problem. But I need to pay really close attention to the one piece of food that is going to be poisonous and could kill me.

So we've evolved as humans to really pay attention to the negative far above and beyond the positive. And what that means is just be kind to yourself because if you do get a negative piece of feedback, it's likely to really weigh on you and you may find yourself really ruminating on it, even if you get 99 pieces of really positive feedback. And you have evolved to pay attention to the negative like that.

So my advice is similar to yours Michael, in the sense that you know, learn from it what you can. Think carefully about whether you trust the person who's given you the feedback, whether you think that they are giving you something of value. But try not to ruminate on the fact that it was negative because yeah, your brain has evolved to really get stuck on that negative thing rather than remember that there's probably, you probably have a whole lot of evidence that generally you do this thing really really well.

And there's probably, you know, whether it was a talk or a piece of writing or whatever it was that you were getting feedback on, chances are you also got a lot of really positive feedback, but your brain has gone over that and fixated on the negative.

And although it's very normal, I think paying attention to that negativity bias and seeking the evidence that actually, you've also done a really excellent job. I think that can really help take the sting out of the negative feedback.

Michael (00:04:05)

Yeah, that's such great advice, thinking about that evolutionary perspective.

Oh, I wish we had evolved to have a positivity bias, but maybe that just doesn't work.

Jen (00:04:18)

Well, I think you can cultivate it, right? You can say, "I acknowledge that this is an area in which I can really improve, And I'm so glad to be given the opportunity to take on board that feedback and improve".

But actually, I'm also going to give myself a pat on the back for all the things that I've done really well. And I'm going to acknowledge you know, how much more knowledgeable or skilled or talented or whatever I'm becoming at this thing. So I think we can you know, cultivate our own positivity bias as well.

Michael (00:04:43)

I think that's fantastic advice. So take it easy on yourself and think about all of the positive feedback that you've received in the past.

And you know, reflect on it, but you don't have to take everything on board or to heart.

Jen (00:04:59)

Yeah. Beautifully said, Michael.

And good luck with whatever you're working on right now. We are here to cheer you on.

Michael (00:05:06)

Good luck. You can do it.

Michael (00:05:18)

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